Thursday, October 18, 2007

Funny of the day

Or considering my posting rate as of late perhaps "funny of the month" would be better. Anywhooooo, found this on one of the sites I visit.

From the Northwest Florida Daily News comes this story,of a couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car breakdown in the parking lot. The man told his wife to go on in and shop while he fixed the car in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection,she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the car. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underwear turned private parts into glaringly public one's. Unable to stand the embarrassment,she stepped forward quickly put her hand up his shorts and tucked everything back into place.On regaining to her feet, she looked up and found her husband staring at her. The mechanic however had to have three stitches in his forehead. So this story means always wear underwear or something like this could happen to you.


Damnit, mom was right again! Always wear clean underwear.

Unless you are a mechanic I guess, then wear a helmet.

BD

Monday, October 01, 2007

Goldilocks

It has been a rather odd few weeks as of late. I told you the story of getting pulled over for driving too slow. It is safe to say that I haven't heard the end of it since then, and truth be told Nor should I. Fast forward a few weeks.....

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?

Me: "I wasn't driving too slow was I?"

Officer: (enter combination weird/ ' Oh so you think you are a smartass' look here),,,,," Could I see your license?"

Me: "Sure."

Brain: "Don't you DARE volunteer your registration!"

Officer: "and your registration?"

Brain: shit

Me: "here you go"

Officer: "Mr. Donkey, do you know how fast you were going?"

Me: "(exhaling),,,,Just tell me I wasn't driving too slow."

Officer: "No sir, you were doing 72 in a 55."

Me: "phewwwwww!"

Officer: " You are happy about it? Is this a joke to you?"

Me: "Oh, no sir! It's just that I got pulled over for driving too slow not long ago. I have been catching hell for it ever since. If I did THAT again, I am sure my car would disown me and I may lose my man card."

Officer: "For driving too slow? (enter laugh here) Nice car by the way."

Brain: Sweet, we may just talk our way out of this.

Officer: "I will be right back."

Brain: Or not

Too slow,,,,,,too fast......Now I just have to figure out what speed is just right.